Lalah

This is a post I wrote September 19, 2007, but never got around to publishing. Funny that it speaks to exactly what I'm going through right now...

Last weekend I went to a concert with my friend, Jon. It was a live recording for the latest chapter of Kirk Whalum’s Gospel According to Jazz series. For those who don’t know the series, Kirk gathers a cadre of incredible jazz artists and records a jam session of great jazz music that interprets or is inspired by Gospel music.

One of the artists on the bill was Lalah Hathaway, one of my favorite singers. She sang a few songs, but one blew me away. The chorus says, “Don’t ask me how I could love you. It’s 'cause I’m love. It’s what I do.”

Whoa! Having struggled for so much of my life to feel lovable, I still occasionally ask God “why.” Why does he love me? Why would he risk/waste so much of himself on me? Why does he chase me when I run? Why does he wait for me to catch up? Why did he keep saying ‘I love you’ when he knew I wouldn’t believe him? Why did he trust me with so much?

A couple of years ago, around the middle of the Living Waters course, the light came on. I truly felt for the first time that God loved me. So, I asked him why and how. And that was his answer, “I love you because I am love.” Hearing the song reminded me of that fact.